Family Night
Family night at the Rickards'. There's so much to say and just too little time. So many opinions. So many differing opinions. Reality t.v., Oprah (christian or anti-christ), Obama (christian or Antichrist),Twilight, Harry Potter, legalizing marijuana, tele-evangelists. On any of these 'hot topics' you can expect to hear several very heated opinions... on all spectrum's. Everyone wanting to make sure there 2 cents is heard... well, more like 20 cents in our family. Where do I even begin? A few weeks ago, as everyone was eating and talking over one another, I decided to take a few notes. This list doesn't capture any heated debates... these are just some random topics and quotes that I managed to jot down as everyone was 'discussing'.
So here's what I came up with. All of what you're about to read was discussed in less than 30 minutes...
1) Bambi- Created by a bunch of hippies. ~ Jacob Rickards
2) Bambi was made in the twenties... there were no hippies in the twenties.
3)Sure there were... they just weren't called 'hippies' back then. But there had to have been free-spirited people back in the 20's.
*Please keep in mind that in the Rickards' family, most people state their opinions as if it is a documented FACT.
4) Masterpiece Theater - Which Jane Eyre was better.
"Ah, I loved the new one!" ~Reed
"Really? I hated it." ~ Joanna
5) The Great Divorce. The book. The play. The movie. (various opinions on all).
6) There's an unusual amount of swearing in the play (Great Divorce). Lot's of G-- D----'s.
7) Why you shouldn't say 'G-- D----' according to Billy Brimm. ~ Grandma
8) Can someone make some coffee?! ~ Dad or Jacob
9) I will... (mom gets up to make coffee, then disappears to 'Evangeline's Room'). Fight or flight? Mom mostly chooses 'flight' these days.
10) "I think we should have a family night with no phones." (me) "That's an awful idea." (Reaghan) "We don't even use our phones during dinner."
11) 2 minutes later... Reaghan looks down at her phone... "What?! I'm done eating!"
12) I still say we should give up our phones for family night. ~Jessica
13) "Well, maybe... but what if we have to ask Siri something?" Jacob
14) Rosie O'Donnell and Tom Cruise: I wonder if they still get along?
15) Eminem: Passionate, yet misdirected.
16) Watching t.v. while eating pizza and Chinese food... (I believe this is in reference to Jacob and Joanna's first year of marriage).
17) Having dreams about killing people. That's normal, right?
18) Sleep walking. Remember the time Jessica forced Reed to make cookies in the middle of the night, then didn't even remember eating them?!
19) My Town (referring to the fb game, I guess?) My town is way more organized than your town. You spend way too much time on your town. Well how many coins do you have? What are you even buying with your coins? I bet you don't have Mt. Fuji.
20) You should check Jacob's credit card... I bet he's spending real money on his town.
21) "No I'm not!" ~Jacob
22) "What's that Justin Timberlake movie? You know... the one where he kidnaps someone... Pecking Order?... Friend's with Benefits?..." ~ Dad
23) "You mean 'Alpha Dog'?" (Joanna) "Yeah, that one!" (dad)
24) Jessica's eye twitch... seems to increase with intense circumstances.
25) Facebook Etiquette: FB couples... how much is too much? One should definitely 'comment' before leaving a thread of conversations.
26) "Well... I'm gonna write a book about fb etiquette, because it's getting out of control." ~Jessica
27) Who would name their kid Phillip... when their last name is Phillip?!
28) How exhausting family night is...
29) "Who made the coffee?! They forgot to add the coffee!" ~Jacob
30) "Oh... mom made it. She does that all the time." ~ Reaghan
31) "Man... look at my tan line!" ~Reaghan
32) "Reaghan... stop obsessing over your tan line." ~ Reed
33) What's better? Droid or iphone? ... I want the baby of a droid and iphone.
34) "Don't give me attitude... I'm not giving you attitude." ~Jessica to Reaghan
35) "Grandma, why do you take so many pictures of yourself?" ~Reaghan (while scrolling through Grandma's camera)
36) "Well... I didn't have a mirror... and I don't know how to delete." ~Grandma
37) The Space Station... "Wait... do they work upside down?" ~Reaghan
38) "My cats will drink my hot tea. But ,of course, I don't let them." ~ Grandma
39) How to tell if roadkill is fresh enough to eat.
40) "Even if the world ends tomorrow... we'll still have plenty of clothes... you won't have to tan a buck skin." ~ Jacob ( I have no idea where this came from)
41) "You know that time I hurt my foot real bad and put a picture of it on facebook? Well, I had to edit it to make it look as bad as it felt... I may have even used some purple eyeshadow." ~Reed
42) "We should have a family survivor night. Everybody gets a torch, then we get to vote people out. Reaghan, you'd be the first to go tonight."~ Reed (copyright reedrickards)
Of course, as I'm writing everything down... Reed and I are negotiating who gets to put certain stories in their book. "That's my story. I call that one." (Reed) "Well, you can have the 'foot story' if I can have the 'Grandma story'." (me)
Our conclusion is that we definitely need a moderator at the dinner table... kind of like 'The View'. It wouldn't hurt to have someone that can abruptly change topics without being questioned... and cut to commercial breaks when necessary.
Seriously... less than 30 minutes.
So here's what I came up with. All of what you're about to read was discussed in less than 30 minutes...
1) Bambi- Created by a bunch of hippies. ~ Jacob Rickards
2) Bambi was made in the twenties... there were no hippies in the twenties.
3)Sure there were... they just weren't called 'hippies' back then. But there had to have been free-spirited people back in the 20's.
*Please keep in mind that in the Rickards' family, most people state their opinions as if it is a documented FACT.
4) Masterpiece Theater - Which Jane Eyre was better.
"Ah, I loved the new one!" ~Reed
"Really? I hated it." ~ Joanna
5) The Great Divorce. The book. The play. The movie. (various opinions on all).
6) There's an unusual amount of swearing in the play (Great Divorce). Lot's of G-- D----'s.
7) Why you shouldn't say 'G-- D----' according to Billy Brimm. ~ Grandma
8) Can someone make some coffee?! ~ Dad or Jacob
9) I will... (mom gets up to make coffee, then disappears to 'Evangeline's Room'). Fight or flight? Mom mostly chooses 'flight' these days.
10) "I think we should have a family night with no phones." (me) "That's an awful idea." (Reaghan) "We don't even use our phones during dinner."
11) 2 minutes later... Reaghan looks down at her phone... "What?! I'm done eating!"
12) I still say we should give up our phones for family night. ~Jessica
13) "Well, maybe... but what if we have to ask Siri something?" Jacob
14) Rosie O'Donnell and Tom Cruise: I wonder if they still get along?
15) Eminem: Passionate, yet misdirected.
16) Watching t.v. while eating pizza and Chinese food... (I believe this is in reference to Jacob and Joanna's first year of marriage).
17) Having dreams about killing people. That's normal, right?
18) Sleep walking. Remember the time Jessica forced Reed to make cookies in the middle of the night, then didn't even remember eating them?!
19) My Town (referring to the fb game, I guess?) My town is way more organized than your town. You spend way too much time on your town. Well how many coins do you have? What are you even buying with your coins? I bet you don't have Mt. Fuji.
20) You should check Jacob's credit card... I bet he's spending real money on his town.
21) "No I'm not!" ~Jacob
22) "What's that Justin Timberlake movie? You know... the one where he kidnaps someone... Pecking Order?... Friend's with Benefits?..." ~ Dad
23) "You mean 'Alpha Dog'?" (Joanna) "Yeah, that one!" (dad)
24) Jessica's eye twitch... seems to increase with intense circumstances.
25) Facebook Etiquette: FB couples... how much is too much? One should definitely 'comment' before leaving a thread of conversations.
26) "Well... I'm gonna write a book about fb etiquette, because it's getting out of control." ~Jessica
27) Who would name their kid Phillip... when their last name is Phillip?!
28) How exhausting family night is...
29) "Who made the coffee?! They forgot to add the coffee!" ~Jacob
30) "Oh... mom made it. She does that all the time." ~ Reaghan
31) "Man... look at my tan line!" ~Reaghan
32) "Reaghan... stop obsessing over your tan line." ~ Reed
33) What's better? Droid or iphone? ... I want the baby of a droid and iphone.
34) "Don't give me attitude... I'm not giving you attitude." ~Jessica to Reaghan
35) "Grandma, why do you take so many pictures of yourself?" ~Reaghan (while scrolling through Grandma's camera)
36) "Well... I didn't have a mirror... and I don't know how to delete." ~Grandma
37) The Space Station... "Wait... do they work upside down?" ~Reaghan
38) "My cats will drink my hot tea. But ,of course, I don't let them." ~ Grandma
39) How to tell if roadkill is fresh enough to eat.
40) "Even if the world ends tomorrow... we'll still have plenty of clothes... you won't have to tan a buck skin." ~ Jacob ( I have no idea where this came from)
41) "You know that time I hurt my foot real bad and put a picture of it on facebook? Well, I had to edit it to make it look as bad as it felt... I may have even used some purple eyeshadow." ~Reed
42) "We should have a family survivor night. Everybody gets a torch, then we get to vote people out. Reaghan, you'd be the first to go tonight."~ Reed (copyright reedrickards)
Of course, as I'm writing everything down... Reed and I are negotiating who gets to put certain stories in their book. "That's my story. I call that one." (Reed) "Well, you can have the 'foot story' if I can have the 'Grandma story'." (me)
Our conclusion is that we definitely need a moderator at the dinner table... kind of like 'The View'. It wouldn't hurt to have someone that can abruptly change topics without being questioned... and cut to commercial breaks when necessary.
Seriously... less than 30 minutes.
Comments
Thanks for the chuckles!